Lord, to Whom Shall We Go?

"Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life." - John 6:67-69

We know what it's like when someone does not turn out to be what we expected. When the person we thought would help us lets us down, when they are not who they appear to be. That is what many felt about Jesus. They had left, disappointed he was not the kind of leader they had imagined. Jesus turned to his twelve closest followers who remained. "You do not want to leave too, do you?" Peter, one of the disciples, answered. "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life."

That is the question, is it not? Where else would we go? We do not usually walk away physically. But we know what it feels like when something starts to shift. When God's promises do not look like we expected. When what we asked for has not shown up. We start pulling back without quite realizing it.

Jeremiah asked it. "Is there no balm in Gilead?... Why then is there no healing for the wound of my people?" (Jeremiah 8:22). And somewhere in that asking, when nothing changes, we start wondering if maybe those promises were not meant for us. Maybe we misread what God was offering.

But what if we are expecting answered prayers to function like proof, evidence that God loves us, when they are really about presence, not proof?

There's something David noticed. "Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls; all your waves and breakers have swept over me. By day the Lord directs his love" (Psalm 42:7-8). In the middle of the waves, not after. The psalmist says elsewhere, "You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar" (Psalm 139:2). That constant knowing. That continual nearness. What if that is the promise?

Some of us came to Jesus expecting specific outcomes. When those did not arrive, we were the ones who turned. Hearts closing. Trust pulled back. Watch what happens with Jesus the night before he died. "Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done." Then an angel from heaven appeared to him and strengthened him (Luke 22:42-43). The angel did not remove the cup. Just strengthened Him in it. The promise was not deliverance from suffering. It was presence through suffering. Paul understood this. "God is able to bless you abundantly, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work" (2 Corinthians 9:8). Not because circumstances changed. Because He is near.

We're starting to see something. Think about Peter's answer again. He did not say "I understand Your promises now." He just recognized there was nowhere else to go. "You have the words of eternal life" (John 6:68). Not "you gave me what I wanted." The words. Him. The fact that we are still asking questions? We are still here. Still turning toward Him. Jesus said, "Whoever comes to me I will never drive away" (John 6:37). The questions we thought showed our doubt are actually what's keeping us close. That is the gift.

Prayer

Father, when we cannot see Your promises manifesting, help us hear Peter's question. Where else would we go? Teach us Your faithful love is directing us even now, even when we cannot feel it yet. Amen.